Ah, the infamous micro-manager. You know the type: the boss who needs updates about updates, scrutinizes every font choice in your PowerPoint, and knows what you’re having for lunch because they’ve already asked.
As executive assistants, we’re often caught in the delicate balance of meeting their needs while preserving our sanity—and our schedules. But fear not! With a little finesse and a touch of humor, you can manage your micro-manager and lead from behind like the stealthy hero you are.
- Understand Their “Why”
Start with some empathy. Most micro-managers are driven by insecurity and anxiety, most likely due to past experiences where things spiraled when they weren’t in the loop. This gives them a deep-seated need for control. Understanding their “why” can help you tailor your approach. Are they detail-obsessed because they fear mistakes? Do they need constant updates because they don’t trust the process? Once you’ve identified the root cause, you can address their concerns pre-emptively.
Pro tip: Frame your updates in a way that addresses their anxieties. For example, instead of saying, “I’ll email the client tomorrow,” try, “I’ve scheduled an email to the client for 9 AM tomorrow and will confirm receipt by noon.”
- Over-Communicate Strategically
If your boss thrives on details, beat them to the punch. Send regular updates before they have to ask. Use bullet points, bold headings, or even a colorful chart if it helps. The goal is to provide enough information that they feel informed but not overwhelmed.
Pro tip: Establish a “communication rhythm” like a daily email summary or a weekly check-in meeting. This gives them the reassurance they crave while creating boundaries around your time.
- Anticipate Their Needs
Micro-managers often hover because they’re worried about something falling through the cracks. By anticipating their needs, you can reduce their hovering time and boost their confidence in you.
Pro tip: Keep a running list of their preferences and pet peeves. Do they prefer PDFs over Word docs? Are they obsessed with grammar? The more you cater to their quirks, the less they’ll feel the need to micromanage.
- Create the Illusion of Control
This one’s sneaky but effective. Let them feel like they’re driving the ship, even if you’ve already plotted the course. Present your recommendations with options (all of which you’ve vetted) and ask for their input.
Pro tip: Phrase things as questions. Instead of, “I booked the venue for the event,” try, “I’ve narrowed the venue choices to these three options based on cost and availability. Which do you prefer?”
- Set Boundaries (Without Saying “No”)
Micro-managers often push boundaries unintentionally. If you’re getting calls at 10 PM about tomorrow’s coffee order, it’s time to set some limits—graciously, of course.
Pro tip: Use phrases like, “To keep everything on track, I’ll tackle this first thing in the morning” or “Let’s revisit this after I’ve finalized the presentation.”
- Celebrate Their Wins
Micro-managers are people, too! They may not hear “thank you” often, and their need for control might stem from feeling unappreciated. A little praise can go a long way.
Pro tip: Acknowledge their contributions in meetings or emails. For example, “Your attention to detail really made a difference in that client proposal.”
- Master the Art of Leading from Behind
As an executive assistant, you have the unique ability to guide your micro-manager without them even realizing it. By staying one step ahead, managing their quirks, and framing your support as collaboration, you’re not just managing—you’re leading.
Pro tip: Keep your endgame in mind. Your goal isn’t just to survive their micro-managing but to help them become more confident in their role (and in you).
Wrapping It All Up
Dealing with a micro-manager can feel like an Olympic sport, but with empathy, strategy, and a sprinkle of humor, you can turn it into a rewarding partnership. Remember, you’re not just an assistant; you’re a behind-the-scenes MVP making everything (and everyone) shine. Keep rocking it, and don’t forget to give yourself credit for the magic you bring to the table every day.
